Bellies, hip bones, fingers, lips – you have at least one of those things, probably. There's an assumption that men have less to work with, but that's not true. Nudes are for titillation, dick pics are the logical conclusion to an appropriately lengthy sexting session – and, even then, I'd argue that full-on genital shots ruin the anticipation. Important caveat for men: dick pics and nudes aren't the same thing. No need to dedicate an entire folder in your camera roll to the occasion, just take a photo of your mouth and hurl it into the abyss to be watched twice before disappearing forever. Instagram DMs and Snapchat are useful because they are impermanent. Sympathy must be attributed to the fact that straight men are famously uncomfortable with taking photos of themselves, and nudes fall into this bracket, but there are ways to circumvent the condition. What gives?Īn obvious move, one would think. We're out here racking up debt on elaborate lingerie and sex toys, rubbing one out over literally everyone we've ever met and taking close-up photos of our arseholes. More a vague disinterest, like the way most of us feel about cocaine at a small get-together – "Yeah, go on then, if there's some going." Given the option, the majority of men would rather spend an evening on Ableton Live with a buffet of RedTube tabs open. It's not an aggressive anti-sex stance, like incels pretend to have. But when it comes to having an actual sexual encounter, they simply can't be arsed. I'm not saying they don't like the idea of it. Playing Red Dead Redemption II, listening to serialised podcasts about some HBO drama, shitting. We're told they do – loads! phwoar! – but by and large they would much rather be doing something else. One of the greatest realisations I have had as an adult is that straight men don't care about sex.
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